HOW TO GET OUT OF THE JAIL OF THE MIND

Most of us get stuck in  the illusion, that if we only knew WHY we do that dumb thing we do, we’d just stop doing it. How many times have you said, “Wow, I’ll never do THAT again!” only to find yourself in the middle of the same bad movie script (crappy job, unhappy relationship, fight with your family) again down the road. Suppose you absolutely knew that you learned how to put up with crappy jobs from your father, or that you avoid staying married to prevent yourself from experiencing the pain your mother experienced when your dad died. Great, you know why. 

That and five dollars might get you a latte or a gallon of gas. But that knowledge does not inform your awareness about the thoughts, inner rules, and stories that  keep you running on that hamster wheel. Knowing HOW you do what you do gives you the magic key that opens the jail of the mind. The more consciously aware we are of the world around and within us, and the less we live in the world of our own thoughts, the better able we are to relax and respond to whatever happens. Learning to slow down just enough to observe our thoughts allows us to notice a story, a fear or a bias that otherwise would send us straight to Reactionville.  That ability to notice, observe, witness, be mindful...whatever ya wanna call it...is what gives us the answer to "How does this keep happening?"

The more “present” we are, living in and experiencing the world, the more we are able to separate our fear based assumptions and invented stories from our experience. The alternative, which many of us suffer with, is to live much of life in our heads, trapped in thoughts , worries, and assessments (many of which are compulsively, annoyingly repetitive) while missing important clues around and within us. We are tightly wound, tense, and reactive in much of our lives. This affords us little time or space to have the objectivity we need to distinguish between our pre-programmed bullshit and what's really going on.

HOW to start...Practice becoming more aware of your surroundings and more aware of the sensations and emotions in your body.  This awareness is packed with information and serves as a powerful guide to action. When we mostly live in our heads we invent a version of reality that we then confuse with what’s really going on in the world around us. We can even become radically out of touch with our own actions and motives. Surely you know at least one person who operates like this. Maybe it is you. 

Each of us has had days in which we felt “out of it” and days in which we think we can’t even find our own ass with both hands. Interestingly enough, finding your ass with both hands is exactly the right place to begin. Whether you are anxious, annoyed, tired, or just having an “off” day,  turn your attention to your body, and notice your breath, notice your thoughts , then come back to your body, feel your feet on the ground, look up and see the sky, be aware of the moment that you are in and aware of  all your senses.  Then, you will “wake up” a little. Your mind will become quiet after a few minutes. You will feel calmer, more able to focus. You may even have an insight about something or feel an urge to do something particular. Or not. You may just feel alive and at ease and maybe a little grateful in this world. Congratulations. That’s mindfulness. That’s how to Be Here Now. You don’t need chanting monks, a special room, or nag champa incense to be mindful. Just a little patience. Start there, and tell me HOW that works for you!